Gone Forever
by Kenji Star
Summary: Beast Boy had always had his hidden doubts, but they surface after a battle with Cinderblock. What happens when he decides that the team is better off without him and leaves?
1. Some Decisions are best made alone

Disclaimer - If I owned the Teen Titans I'd probably be doing something else other than writing stories now wouldn't I? But yeah, I own nothing other than the ideas that come from my head.

A/N: Well...this would be my first story on FFN and this shall be my test story. Constructive criticism is always welcome, but if you wish to flame...make it a flame that has a reason behind it and not just "OMG, Thats the stoopidest thing I eva seen be4" So yeah, enjoy.

Prolgue -------

"Titans Go!"

It was a simple order comprised of just two simple words, 8 letters and 3 syllables, but that simple order was enough for 5 teenagers to throw away all uncertainty and charge forward to defeat the enemy. Whether they were fighting giant blobs of plasma, a midget with more gadgets than Robin had, or a giant slab of animate stone, they never failed to attack once that signal was said. It was after that simple signal was said during a fight with Cinderblock that would force every member of the Teen Titans to realize just how valuable a certain green changeling was to them.

Part 1 Some decisions are meant to be made alone---------

Beast Boy laid in the infirmary bed and stared at the ceiling. Normally he'd be downstairs arguing with Cyborg over what to eat for breakfast. Beast Boy would betrying to convince Cyborg to cooktofu and Cyborg would only ask how someone could eat the tasteless garbage that is tofu. Yet this wasn't like any other day, this day was much different from any other day.

'Do they really even need me here?' Of all the questions that the green changeling had asked himself during his night of sleeplessness, this one question was the only one that he continually asked himself. 'All I ever do is bug the others and I always seem to only get hurt in a fight instead of actually helping.'

flashback------------

_Beast Boy morphed into a rhino and charged directly at Cinderblock, ramming directly into him (it, whatever Cinderblock is) and sent it flying into an adjacent building. He morphed back and gave one of his trademarked grins to his companions._

"_Piece of cake," Beast Boy said, but his grin changed to a look of confusion as he saw the faces of the other Titans, it was one of complete fear. "Beast Boy, look…" He never had a chance to hear the rest of the statement as Cinderblock had easily recovered from the earlier attack and had slammed his fist into Beast Boy's stomach which lifted him into the air slightly. Before anyone had a chance to react, Cinderblock sent Beast Boy flying at a nearby building. The impact was great enough to leave Beast Boy in his own imprint, completely stuck to the wall while blood trickled down from behind him. His last sight before going unconscious was the sight of Cinderblock slowly ambling towards him, ready to finish the job._

end flashback--------------

Beast Boy cringed as he thought of how painful that blow was. While he was used to getting beat up during a fight, it seemed to him that they were getting worse and worse as time progressed. It seemed that everyone else was growing stronger while he was staying the same weakling Beast Boy that he always was. 'Maybe everyone would be better off if I just disappeared.'

Beast Boy's thoughts were interrupted by a discussion going on just outside the infirmary door. Beast Boy instantly recognized the voices as belonging to Robin, the fearless leader of the Teen Titans, and Starfire, the Tamaranean who was the constant source of optimism for the group.

"Please tell me friend Beast Boy will be alright," Starfire's voice had the same worried tone that it always had after Beast Boy was injured. Sure she had that same tone when everyone was hurt, but Beast Boy was injured so often that it was almost exclusive to him now.

"He received a pretty nasty shot, but he'll make it. He always does," Beast Boy couldn't tell whether Robin was glad that he was going to recover or if he was upset that he had been injured yet again. Beast Boy knew it was both, but something in Robin's tone made him feel that it was leaning more towards the latter. Starfire didn't catch the tone of his voice, only the news that came with it. "Oh joyous, I shall inform the others that our friend Beast Boy will recover."

An audible sigh could be heard from Robin as Starfire left. There was something that Robin hadn't told Starfire, but he'd be damned if he didn't tell the person involved. Robin entered the room and almost looked surprised that Beast Boy was awake, but quickly regained his normal demeanor again and walked up to Beast Boy's bed. "How ya feeling Beast Boy?" 'Besides the broken ribs I'm just peachy' Beast Boy thought to himself. "Better than that wall did after I hit it," Beast Boy said in what he tried to mask as his normal, comedic tone but he failed miserably.

"Look Beast Boy," Robin looked over at Beast Boy with concern in his voice. 'Something is not right, why is looking at me like I'm on my death bed? Oh god…' "There's something I didn't tell Starfire because I was afraid she wouldn't be able to take the news. Beast Boy you…" Before he had a chance to finish his statement, a gleeful Starfire burst into the room, dragging both Raven and Cyborg with her as well. 'Damnit! I'm what! What was he about to say?'

"Friend Beast Boy, I have brought Raven and Cyborg to see you!" 'She means well, but sometimes I just wish Starfire would for once just keep to herself' Beast Boy started to sit up to greet his friends, but a sharp pain caused him to cringe and grip his stomach. "BEAST BOY!" It was Starfire who was the first (and surprisingly only) Titan to show concern for his quick movements. "You should stay lying down, you still have not yet recovered."

Beast Boy was about to retort Starfire when he was stopped by a warm liquid seeping through the bandage around his abdomen. "I just dressed that wound too," Cyborg said while shaking his head. 'Way to show you care Cyborg.' Beast Boy thought to himself, but made no effort to say anything.

It wasn't long before Robin was able to get everyone out of the room. But it wasn't that they didn't want to leave, no they didn't care and Beast Boy knew that…or at least he thought he knew that. 'There they go, the Titans, the only people that didn't judge me because of what I look like, but is it really enough? They don't judge me, but am I really their friend?' Beast Boy shook his head to get the thoughts out, but once again he failed to do it, he always failed to do anything right.

'No of course they're my friends. Cyborg and I are practically like brothers. Starfire…well Starfire would call a soap dish her friend and mean it at the same time, but she is still my friend. Robin, actually I'm not so sure about Robin. Sometimes I wonder if he ever even considered me his friend, especially after I turned into that…thing.' After that incident with turning into the beast,Beast Boy entertained thethought about leaving the Titans. Robin was so quick to blame Beast Boy for hurting Raven thathe wasn't even given a chance to defend himself. Not that it would have mattered anyway. "I could have had a videotape of myself playing videogames at the time and he'd still think I did it."

Beast Boy let out an audible sigh at that realization. Robin, the fearless leader, the boy wonder, had no faith in one his teammates. It was hard to believe at first, but than Beast Boy just had to think of twisted logic to go behind it. 'Of course he doesn't. I'm useless to the team. He was probably just using that situation as an excuse to kick me out of the tower and have me out of his life forever.'

'That only leaves one more member…Raven. What was she to me? I don't really know…I mean, we don't exactly fit into the whole description of friends. She constantly insults me, makes fun of the things I do, and all I ever do is get on her nerves no matter what I'm trying to do or what my intentions are. Yet…there are time were we seem like friends, maybe even a little more than that. Whenever something is going on with one of us, the other is always there to help the other. No matter what happens, we always seem to be there to comfort each other like with what happened after Malchior and Terra. But…does she think of me as a friend?' It was a difficult question for Beast Boy to answer. One would think it'd be simple to know who is your friend and who isn't, but this wasn't the case. 'Happy seemed to think of me as a friend, but that's just one of her emotions. What about the rest of her?'

As if fate had heard his question, the object of his self-questioning came through the doorway to the medical wing carrying a small tray with some tofu on it. Seeing that Beast Boy was awake, Raven walked over and handed the plate over to Beast Boy. He was about to ask why she had brought it in when she started speaking. "You looked a little seeing as how you haven't eaten since before you got hurt so I decided to bring you some tofu." Raven was speaking in her normal monotone, or at least she was trying to, but there was something else there that Beast Boy noticed in her tone. An underlying fear that she was trying hard to suppress.

Curiosity got the better of Beast Boy and he had to find out what was going on. "You okay Rae?" Raven stared at Beast Boy as if he had just asked the dumbest question he had ever asked. "You're injured and you ask me if I'm okay?" It was now Beast Boy's turn to give the same stare back at Raven that he had just received. "Well of course, we're friends and you seemed…upset…about something and I just wanted to find out what was wrong." 'At least I think we're friends…'

Raven shot Beast Boy a look of annoyance. "Since when did you care so much about how I was feeling?" Without waiting for an answer Raven quickly exited the medical wing. 'I knew it…she does hate me, but can you blame her? All I ever do is annoy her.' Beast Boy sighed before he made a decision that would change his life forever.

"Tomorrow…I'll be gone tomorrow. They'll probably be so happy to see me gone. Either that or they wont even notice, not even Raven." With that said, Beast Boy closed his eyes and fell into another restless sleep.


	2. It's Always Hard to let go

A/N: Oh my god, people reviewed my story? Wait...8 people reviewed my story! That's more than I thought I'd ever get. Anyway, I just wanted to say that I'm not personally fond of this chapter. Unlike chapter 1, this one didnt flow quite right. Hopefully I'll fix whatever problem I'm having with writing by next chapter. Oh also, you might notice a slightly...different writing style in this chapter. I write in..uhhh I think it's called third person limited style. Everything you read is going to be from a single person's point of view so you dont find out anything until said character finds out anything. Think of it as you're BB's personal stalker throughout the story. Scary thing is, I know a few people who would love to have that title.

Respond to the reviwers:

**Dracotk **- Thanks, I liked it too.

**Wrathchylde** - Grammatical errors? Dang, I thought I caught 'em all last read through. I'll try harder this time.

**The Master of Skittles **- Awww man...now I actually have to live up to my own standards. fake poutingHeh, thanks for the comments. Technically it isn't my first story ever, but it's the first one I've ever put out in public. As for what Beast Boy will do, that'll come soon and astohow Raven will react? Heh, you'll just have to read and find out.

**lovex3spell** - Wow, first story and it is on someones favorite list already? Eep, too much pressure! Heh, just kidding. In fact, I'm flattered and it gives me another reason to keep going. Thanks.

**Raidersrule76** - I wouldn't normally feel too bad if someone ripped off an idea of mine, but thanks for the heads up.

**mdizzle** - Leave a note? Beast Boy leaving a note? That almost seems...unBeast Boy. He seems more like the unrational type...either that or the type that'll tell everyone in person, but no worries. Beast Boy is planning to tell people, but as you shall read, things dont always go as planned.

**DAYLIGHT ANGEL - **I completely agree, Beast Boy is the best. However, as I said in the authors note, everything is from BB's POV. That means that he doesn't know everything that is going on outside of what he knows and neither should anyone else...besides me of course. evil grin

**TDG3RD **- I know the feeling especially since I'm writing it, but if you watch enough, you'll see the justification behind some of the resentment. However, as I said before...Beast Boy doesn't know everything that is going on.

_I now accept annonymous reviews!_ Sorry 'bout that, but I forgot to uncheck that box earlier so, yeah...my bad. rubs back of myneck nervously

Disclaimer - I do not and shall never own Teen Titans. If I did, we would have seen the friggin prophecy episode by now! No wait, scratch that...we would have finished the fourth season by now!

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Chapter 2 -----It's always hard to let go

Beast Boy didn't want to open his eyes because there was a part of him that didn't want to leave. The tower had been his home for so long and the other Titans had been like a family to him. Giving up something like that is hard to do no matter how a person feels. 'Is this the best thing to do? Am I really going to give up my home?'

Beast Boy sat up slowly and swung his legs off the infirmary bed. Not exactly sure how injured he actually was, Beast Boy very slowly stood up. His muscles protested the movement, but with some effort he was able to get up. "Now for the hard part…walking to my room." Beast Boy said quietly to himself as he started for his room.

Beast Boy continued to walk to his room, step after agonizing step. But it wasn't the physical pain that hurt, no it was much deeper than that. 'This place has so many memories attached to it…no stop thinking that Beast Boy. They don't want you here so why waste anymore of their time?' It took him nearly 20 minutes to trek the short distance between the medical room and his own room, but the time passed like seconds as he fought away the memories. He had nearly broken down when he had passed Raven's door.

Flashback ------

"_You think you're alone Raven, but you're not." Words that Beast Boy had spoken directly from his heart and had no intention of proving to be false. It was hard to say something like that to a door, but he didn't care. Raven was in pain and he couldn't stand to see her in pain._

_Suspecting that his words had reached deaf ears, Beast Boy almost sighed in defeat. Imagine his surprise when the door finally opened and Raven hugged him. A blush crept onto his face as he fought the urge to say something he had always wanted to say. 'She's hurt Beast Boy, don't take advantage of her like that' He thought to himself. It almost pained him to push her away but he had to. By tomorrow she'd just be back to the same old Raven and insult him again for being moronic._

"_STANKBALL!"_

_A ball made of dirty laundry slammed directly into Beast Boy's head knocking him to the ground. He groaned in disgust as the smell entered into his nose, but before he could grab the ball and throw the ball back at Cyborg, he felt it lift off him. He looked up in time to see Raven levitating it above her hand with a mischievous smile on her face. He could hear Cyborg's pleas for mercy, but paid no attention to him as his entire attention was directed to the smile on Raven's face. 'I never thought I'd ever get her to smile…well I didn't do anything, but I can dream I did.'_

End flashback ------------

"She may not be alone, but I am…" Beast Boy sighed for the…well, he lost count of how many times he had sighed today. Without another thought, Beast Boy slowly slid his door open and stepped inside. Seeing the disaster that was his room, Beast Boy smirked. He started to look at everything in his room: The piles of dirty uniforms, the pizza boxes, the bed that had probably never been made since he first slept in it. Yet the smirk disappeared when he remembered what he was doing there. "I better hurry this up…the others might catch me if I take too long." He then silently started to grab as many things as he could and shoved them into a green duffle bag.

After having fit everything he felt he needed, he made his way downstairs. When he made it to the common room, he could hear muffled voices from behind the door. 'Crap…why are they up at…' Beast Boy looked at the watch he had grabbed from his room. '10:30? I knew that took too long. Why do I always…' Beast Boy's thoughts were interrupted when he suddenly heard shouting from the other side of the door.

"Why do you have to be such an ass Robin! Sure he has messed up every once in a while, but that is no reason to kick him off the team!" Beast Boy instantly recognized the voice at Raven, but who was she defending? Instead of just barging in and telling them he was leaving, Beast Boy stood behind the door and listened to the confrontation. "Every once in a while? Every once in a while is how much the rest of us mess up. Beast Boy messes up every time we go on a mission! He is a liability to the team, Raven." It didn't take a genius to know that it was Robin answering back. Ever since the beast incident Robin has always held a grudge against Beast Boy, but he tried not to show it so as to not upset Starfire.

'So they're arguing about me huh? Hang on…Raven's defending me? But why?' "No he is not. If it weren't for him than Terra would have probably finished us off without a second thought. If it weren't for him than we would have never defeated Adonis when he transformed!" Beast Boy was having trouble understanding this situation. He knew that Robin held a grudge, but he couldn't understand why Raven would defend him, especially defend him so strongly. "It was his fault that Adonis turned into that thing in the first place and besides, he attacked you. Once again he showed that he isn't fit to be a Teen Titan."

The sound of glass shattering signaled Raven's rising anger at the situation, but what startled Beast Boy the most was the new tone in her voice. She had finally ditched the monotone and was practically screaming at Robin. "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU? HE NEVER HURT ME! HE'D NEVER HURT ME!" Beast Boy nodded his head at how true that last statement was until he nearly fell over in surprise. 'Wait what? Sure it's true, but when did she pay enough attention to notice?' "STOP DEFENDING HIM RAVEN! HE ATTACKED THE TEAM! THAT RIGHT THERE JUSTIFIES ME KICKING HIM OFF THE TEAM!"

More windows shattered as Raven's anger continued to rise. 'Oh god, she's pissed. If she doesn't calm down…no don't think about that. Just think of something.' But before he could do anything, the door in front of him was ripped away by Raven's powers. Cyborg got a petrified look on his face and poked Raven to get her attention before pointing towards the entryway. Both Raven and Robin looked over to see Beast Boy standing in the doorway. "Oh god…did you just hear all that?" Raven asked, her voice filled with fear. Beast Boy could only nod slowly, a look of both hurt and shock on his face. But it quickly went away as he made his way over to the two. "Don't bother arguing about kicking me off the team, I'm leaving anyway."

It wasn't graceful in any form of the word, but it got the message across. Beast Boy was leaving and if all went according to plan, he wasn't coming back. "But…Beast Boy." Beast Boy cringed at the tone Raven was using. It was the same pained voice that was masked in monotone when she had brought him the tofu back in the infirmary. 'That's what she was worried about, she knew Robin was kicking me off the team.' Raven was about to say something again when Beast Boy cut her off.

"Don't Raven…this is hard enough as it is." Beast Boy glanced up at Robin who both wore a saddened, but almost triumphant look on his face. It made the changeling sick to think he ever admired Robin before. Taking out his communicator, Beast Boy tossed it to Robin before starting for the door. "You're right Robin, I am a liability to the team. Might as well cut off a useless limb instead of letting it weigh you down."

Beast Boy could hear Raven choking back tears and it nearly killed him inside. Without thinking about the consequences, Beast Boy walked right up to Raven and hugged her tightly. He was surprised when she hugged him back with all her might as if doing so would keep him from leaving. "Goodbye Raven…I'll miss our friendship." Beast Boy pulled away suddenly and ran as fast as he could. He ran as hard as he could away from the tower...away from his home...away from the only place he'd ever felt like he belonged.

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A/N: Okay, bad chapter...bad bad chapter, but I needed to get through that to reach the next one which I promise, on penalty of torture, will be better.

On the next chapter - POV change to Raven as you found out how the events of this and the last chapter came to be. Also, found out the reactions of each and every Titan. Will Cyborg miss his best bud? Will Starfire miss the green boy who always did funny things? Will Robin miss...uhhh...whatever Beast Boy is to Robin? (Seriously, what is Beasy Boy and Robin's relationship? I've never even seen them have a friendly moment between the two) Will Raven miss the only person to always be there for her? (If you say no that to, you shall be slapped with words) Or will they all shrug it off and go on with their lives? Find out next time!

Sorry, I couldn't help myself. R&R


	3. Regret and Loathing

A/N: Here we go! Chapter 3! This is one of the very few POV changes I have planned for this story. Basically everything is from Raven's POV, but it is told as if someone were telling it for her. Once again with the stalker analogy.

Oh and I must apologize for my long absence. My family has been having some serious issues lately and I had to take an extended leave of absence from basically everything. You see, my nephew (he's only a year younger, adopted by my bro but he was still family to me) died by due to some really messed up circumstances and I had to go down to L.A. with my family to basically play servant for my bro and his wife.

Now don't get me wrong, I was happy to do anything that helped to ease the pain, but it still felt weird. Plus there's the fact that everything going on was a real…I don't know how to describe it. Let's just say whereas some people get sad when something happens, I get mad and the trip didn't end so well.

Anyway, I'm back however and can restart the writing process. Sorry again to all of you reviewers and readers.

**Disclaimer - The only thing I own is this story. The TT belong to whoever owns the rights to them so please, no sue me.**

Chapter 3 ------ Regret and Loathing

**A few hours after Beast Boy left**

Raven sat in her room meditating, or at least that's what she was trying to do. For the past hour and a half she had been trying to do what she normally would when you meditate, clear her mind of all thoughts. Yet she couldn't do it, not after what had happened not too long ago. With a frustrated sigh, Raven gave up trying and laid on her bed.

"He…left," It was just a simple statement, but to Raven it held enough weight to it to nearly kill her inside and the strange thing was, she couldn't understand why. She couldn't understand why she was filled with a completely new type of fear when Cinderblock had punched Beast Boy in the chest. She couldn't understand why she had attacked Cinderblock with an almost blind rage afterwards and why she had calmed down just by Cyborg yelling to her that Beast Boy was okay. The thing she couldn't understand the most though was why she had fought so hard against Robin to protect him. 'Wait…protect him? Well, I guess it is like protecting him whenever it comes to Robin.'

Robin. If an outsider were to look at the situation and try and find the reasons for Beast Boy's departure, Robin would be one of the main reasons. Yet Raven wasn't naïve enough to believe that it was all his fault. No…it was everyone's fault. It was shown in subtle ways, but there was an underlying fear in the tower. A fear that Beast Boy would snap at any moment and become that thing again. Every member had their reasons, but in the end Raven knew it was just childish fear.

"A fear that even I embraced…" Yes it was true that Raven had defended Beast Boy every time that someone brought up the incident, but even then she was still afraid. She would always second guess herself afterwards, "Did I do the right thing?" and "Maybe Robin is right" were questions she would always ask herself. Having no one else on her side didn't help the matter any either. Cyborg was always hesitant to join either side for whatever reasons he had, Robin was almost always the one to bring it up, and Starfire would always join her guide to Earth, Robin, because she practically went to Robin for anything she needed to know so of course she would be fed exactly what Robin wanted her to hear and she would join Robin's side in the argument.

Raven was dragged out of her thoughts by a soft, almost timid knocking on her door. Raven was tempted to just throw the person who dared interrupt her mourning…'Wait a minute? Mourning? When did this become mourning?'

"Raven…come on girl I know you're in there. Open the door for a second, I need your help with something." The name registered in Raven's mind almost instantly. Cyborg, her metaphorical big brother in the Titans. 'Why is Cyborg here? Why would he need my help with something?' Raven stood up and made her way to the door. "This better be important Cyborg, I'm trying to meditate." The door slid open to reveal Cyborg, his entire posture showed that he was deeply affected by Beast Boy leaving. It came as a surprise to Raven as Cyborg had been treating Beast Boy pretty coldly the past few days. An uncomfortable silence followed and Raven was starting to get sick of it. Just before she was about to tell him to leave, Cyborg spoke up.

"We have to find him." It was all he said before another strange silence drifted between the two. 'Find him? Of course we have to find him!' "I have to tell him how sorry I am for being such a jerk. He didn't deserve it and now he's gone. We have to get him back or I could never forgive myself." Cyborg looked at Raven with an almost pleading look. No, the look on his face was damn near begging her to agree to help him. "What do you have in mind?"

**Beast Boy POV**

'At least it's not raining.' It was the only good thing that Beast Boy could think of at the moment. He had just willingly left the only people he felt safe around. They wouldn't be immediately scared of him for being different, in fact they accepted him because he was different. For once in his life, he didn't feel useless when he was with the Titans. Now? Now he was back to being the green freak that so many people despised.

"No…I'm worse than that now. Now I'm a monster that not even the other freaks want to be around." Beast Boy continued this self-loathing trip as he walked down back alleys to avoid the people. He didn't want to be reminded that he was a Titan or be reminded of the fact that he wasn't as good looking as Robin or as cool as Cyborg. "I guess it'll be easier for everyone to forget about me if they barely knew who I was in the first place." A fresh wave of tears threatened to break free and this time Beast Boy made no attempt to stop them. He was at least marginally safe from the world here next to a dumpster and no one would hear him, not that he cared anymore.

"What's the point of caring anyway? Every time I let myself care about anything, I lose it in some of the worst ways." Suddenly he became filled with complete hatred for…well nothing really, but it was all he could feel. Hatred, loathing, frustration, anger and all of it had no direction, no purpose. So he vented it the only way he could, yelling at the sky. "WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME! WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE ALL OF THIS? AM I JUST YOUR DAMN PLAYTHING THAT YOU JUST LOVE TO SCREW WITH! WHY CAN'T I JUST BE HAPPY FOR ONCE IN MY GOD DAMN LIFE!"

It seemed after that single exclamation drained all of the energy out of Beast Boy and he collapsed to his knees and cried. Cried for the loss of his parents, cried for all the horrible things that happened afterwards, cried for the loss of his newest family the Titans, but most of all he cried because it was the only thing he had left. The pain and hurt he felt inside were the only things he had left in a world that seemed to reject him wherever he went and it seemed as if it would always be that way. "Why..." His body just couldn't handle it anymore and he collapsed backwards. The word continuing to be repeated over and over again as his mind and body shut down and he fell asleep.

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Crappy ending, but hey...I have to get back somehow right? Anyway, thanks to those who were patient with me. I swear I'll be able to update faster now that things are mostly back to normal around here. 


	4. It was for the Team

A/N: Chapter 4 and this is one was honestly a strange one for me to write. On a personal note, I don't particularly like Robin. However, I am not dense enough to think that Robin would do something like kick BB off the team without a valid reason (or whatever a valid reason is in his mind) so because of that, this chapter came into being. Time for Robin to do some explaining.

Respond to Reviewers

**Raidersrule76** - Hmmmm...depends on the mood I'm in when I write the end. Probably not, but hey...ya never know.

**LadyMaundrell **- Heh...I do that a lot in my writing. However, it doesn't stay that way. Read and find out why.

**GIRL IN STORY **- You liked the way I portrayed Raven's feelings? Jeez...I thought it was overdone, the whole 'what the hell is wrong with me?' thing kind of bugged me when I wrote it, but I guess it wasn't so bad. Oh and thanks!

**John Steppenwolf** - What's scary is I think the same way about Robin.

**iamhollywood** - No worries, next chapter is dedicated to Cyborg and you'll find out stuff that have been brought up in this chapter and the last one.

**keri2004** - Nope, not going to happen. I know it'd seem very likely, but I have something else in mind for BB.

**lovex3spell - **Nope, dont have to wait that long for this chapter. Actually I kind of wanted to get this one out pretty quick because I felt everyone deserves an explanation for Robin's actions.

**Me! **- I dont quite consider Robin an ass, but he does hold some qualities to make me not like the guy.

**dragonlore** - Yeah, it did suck, and yes it did make me feel better. Thank you very much.

**Disclaimer **- Don't own it and have almost gotten over that fact.

Chapter 4 ------ It Was For The Team

**An hour after Beast Boy left**

Whereas Cyborg and Raven seemed almost dead after Beast Boy left, Robin was completely active. Yet he did not use that energy in a way one would normally expect of the Boy Wonder. Train, train, and then train some more would be his normal routine, but in this case all he did…was pace. Pace and think, pace and think. It was like he was stuck in a loop. His thoughts wouldn't leave the situation at hand and no matter how he tried to justify it, a new argument would pop up in his head to have justified not forcing Beast Boy off the team.

'He was dangerous, it had to be done.'

'**But he has been trying to keep himself under control ever since the incident.'**

'What if he still changed and ended up attacking an innocent person?'

'**He has shown very few signs of not being in control.'**

'But still. Because of that…thing…he was a danger to everyone around him.'

'**Raven has the same problem yet you've never gotten onto her case about it.'**

'That's different though. Raven can control it. Beast Boy…'

Robin's thoughts were interrupted by a light knock on his door. "Robin…open up. We need to talk." 'Great…why is Cyborg here?' Although Robin was loathe to admit it, he was almost glad that someone had ended his train of thought before it made him doubt what he had done. "Come on man…open the door." Once again, lost in his own thoughts, Robin had completely forgotten to open the door. Without wasting anymore time, Robin slid the door open.

"What is it Cyborg? I'm really busy and…"

"Why did you do it?"

Robin was surprised by the directness of Cyborg's question. That and the fact that he was interrupted really annoyed the Boy Wonder. "If you're referring to kicking Beast Boy off the team then we already went over that after the fight with Cinderblock. He always gets hurt in fights, he can never pay attention to anything other than video games and whatever he is eating, plus the fact that he could go mental on us and transform into the beast at any given moment." Robin spoke in a very no-nonsense tone. He believed in everything he was saying and his resolve wouldn't be shaken. 'Why is Cyborg bringing this up anyway? He didn't argue with me before about it.'

"All of those problems could have been fixed by just working at it. You didn't have to kick him off the team!" Robin silently thanked that he kept his mask on at all times because at that moment his eyes were wide eyed with astonishment and a hint of fear. When Robin had brought up the topic earlier, Cyborg had not put up much resistance to the idea. Sure he didn't endorse it, but he never really fought against it either. 'Wait a minute…that's right he didn't fight back before.'

"Hang on Cyborg. You didn't seem to care when I told you about this before so why now?"

"I didn't think you'd actually do it! How was I supposed to know that you'd actually kick him off the team?"

"I said I'd do it unless you had any objections and you didn't say a thing! What did you think I was going to do?"

A silence drifted between the two as Cyborg thought of an answer for Robin's question. 'Hah! I knew that'd work.' He was expecting Cyborg to back down and give up. He was expecting Cyborg to do anything other than what he did. Robin didn't even comprehend what Cyborg had done until he was flat on his back, on the far side of his room. Cyborg had punched him across the room.

"He was my friend Robin! He was all of ours friends, but you could never see that. You could never see past that one single event that happened with those damn chemicals. Ever since that day you've completely forgotten the Boy part of his name. You said you did this for the team, but you're just lying to yourself. All you're doing is trying to prove yourself right because all he has done is prove you wrong." Without another word Cyborg left the room. Not so silent curses directed at Robin could be heard growing softer and softer as Cyborg finally disappeared down the corner.

And through it all Robin stayed where he was, absorbing everything that Cyborg was saying and trying his hardest to prove him wrong. It was as if a light bulb had clicked in Robin's head and a wave of guilt crashed into him as he slowly started to realize what he had done was wrong. Yet Robin is a stubborn one and admitting defeat is something that doesn't come naturally to him.

"It was for the team…it was…for the team…it…was…for…the…team." He continued to say it over and over, but the conviction seemed to slowly die away with each time he said it until there was nothing left but his own guilt. "It was…for me."

Admitting defeat was always hard for someone like Robin, but there is something much harder than that. Dealing with the consequences of ones actions. Unfortunately, the consequences of this action affect much more than just himself. He had told himself that it was for the team, but in the end his actions to help the team only hurt it much more deeply than he could have imagined.


End file.
